Grey's Anatomy: Meredith and Derek's Relationship Timeline, Clarified
Meredith Grey and Derek Shepherd had a wild relationship on Grey's Anatomy, from post-it note weddings, elevator love letters, and a lot of breakups. References to miscarriage and death abound in this essay.
On Grey's Anatomy, Meredith Grey and Derek Shepherd's love story had quite a turbulent chronology. Meredith and Derek were central in the drama starting in season 1 since their on-off relationship somehow included every major character in some capacity. Though it did seem like the couple would never get their act together, "MerDer" overcame several challenges including break-ups, new relationships, and major secrets, so defying their detractors.
Since the neurosurgeon was killed off in season 11, Meredith and Derek regretfully cannot be together anymore. That does not mean, though, that the writers overlooked this romance. Meredith may have moved on and started to be an inspiring role model for her kids as well as a Catherine Fox award-winning surgeon (formerly known as Harper Avery), but there have been times when the writers honored Derek and their relationship by referencing particular events they shared.
Relationship Timeline of Meredith and Derek on Grey's Anatomy:
first season
While most pilot episodes introduce the main protagonist, Grey's Anatomy season 1, episode 1, "A Hard Day's Night" advanced things by laying out the Meredith and Derek relationship, which began with a one-night stand. Meredith had no intention of seeing him once more, but the writers hinted that this fling would be revisited—especially given the too strong chemistry would be wasted would.
What nobody anticipated, though, was Derek showing up at the hospital where she worked, identifying himself as one of Seattle Grace's recent visitors. As viewers watched Meredith and Derek battle to keep their personal and professional lives apart for weeks, this chance one-night stand became the gripping hook the show hung on. One of the several ways Grey's Anatomy season 19 referenced season 1 as one of the new interns repeated Meredith's mistake of sleeping with one of the attendees just as the new season started.
Meredith eventually came to see, of course, that something else than their power dynamic was lacking. She started to question whether a casual relationship with Derek was a wise move just a few episodes into season 1.
Meredith shared with Derek in the season 1 finale her mother's illness. Since Meredith had been so quiet to open to Derek in the first place, their relationship took a sad turn when this episode showed that Derek had been married to Addison the entire time.
Two Seasons
Arriving at Seattle Grace in season 2, Addison was ready to settle. Once Meredith found out the two were divorcing, she was ready to date Derek once more, but she changed her mind after he said he was rethinking calling off his marriage.
Meredith urged Derek to pick her over Addison, but he turned down to sign the divorce documents. This turned out to be the best since it allowed fans to witness Meredith develop personally. It meant they grew to know Addison better as well.
It was obvious that their attempts to keep a working relationship—even a friendship—would not be successful. Rather than go home to the wife he wanted to save a relationship, Derek would often choose to stay with Meredith at work.
Season three
The romantic spark between Derek and Meredith flared once more as the two ended up sleeping together at the hospital's prom. Derek knew he still harbours feelings for Meredith.
Meredith wasn't sure if she was ready, thus the fans had to wait until season 3 to see what happened with this legendary Meredith and Derek Grey's Anatomy storyline; but, in season 3, episode 7, "Where the Boys Are," she agrees to start dating Derek again. Of course, this comes after Derek's divorce to Addison and Mark Sloan has become a regular reminder of why Addison and Derek separated in the first place has been finalized. Mark Sloan has become a regular sight at the hospital.
Four seasons
Meredith and Derek are still seeing each other, but the drama starts as they discover their future ideas differ. Meredith wasn't ready to be thinking about that since she was truly suffering in the wake of her mother's death. Derek made it plain to Meredith that he wanted them to start a life together.
Though it helped their characters in the long run since the start of season 4 let Meredith and Derek grow personally and work on several internal issues that kept them back, the break-up helped prolong the will-they, won't-they drama.
Fifth Season
Meredith urged Derek to move in so they might save more time. The couple battled to live under Meredith's roommates, thus the change was not the easiest of ones.
When Meredith and Derek realized they ought to go slow, they displayed tremendous improvement. Meredith and Derek made some of the best decisions they have ever taken since there were a few brief incidents where it appeared as though they might have split, particularly following his toss of her engagement ring away in a fight, but Meredith refused to give up, thus they promptly got back together.
Following the couple's slow approach for the season, Derek proposed to Meredith finally. Many fans felt that the environment fit Derek and Meredith exactly and was quite in line with their personalities since their relationship was based on a love for surgery and medicine.
The couple never made it down the aisle since they ended up allowing Alex Karev and Izzie to choose their venue, so enabling them to have their own wedding.
sixth season
Once their roommates moved out, Meredith and Derek began married life together. Meredith and Derek agreeing to start a family by the end of the season delighted the viewers as well.
As Meredith and Derek battled to conceive, their relationship tested several times; fans especially felt devastated to see Meredith miscarry in the season 6 finale since she had been so eager to inform Derek the news. Meredith and Derek ended up meeting their first daughter, Zola, in season 7, so they didn't have to wait long even though it was a very emotional time.
season 7
Meredith and Derek worked fast to meet Zola's social worker after meeting her so they might begin their new life together.
Zola turned out to be a fantastic addition to the family since her presence let authors explore fresh depths in Meredith and Derek's characters. Meredith tried her best to avoid repeating the same mistakes her mother made raising her, thus the writers included some drama.
Second season
Meredith and Derek's disaster with Zola's birthday cake also brought lots of lighthearted events.
Unfortunately, this happiness didn't last as they lost part of their family in a traumatic plane crash in the Grey's Anatomy season 8 finale ("Flight"). Meredith and Derek escaped the collision, but the trauma followed them.
Season Nine
The season 9 two-part premiere showed Meredith and Derek coming out with physical and emotional injuries from the plane crash, "MerDer's" relationship was seen to be stronger than ever.
Meredith and Derek's family life also continued to bring much happiness to the fans in season 9 and 10 as well, as the couple hosted tea parties and went trick-or-treating as a family.
Tenth Season
Meredith and Derek were happy with their newfound rhythm, and both their careers blossomed after starting new and innovative projects.
Unfortunately, the couple faced another obstacle when Derek was offered a position working under the President, and he was contemplating taking the offer. For weeks, the couple argued about the positives and negatives.
Season 11
Meredith refused to leave Seattle, leading Derek to take the offer and leave without them.
It was certainly a catalyst in Derek and Meredith almost splitting up, as the two proceeded to go weeks at a time without talking to one another. Meredith even suspected Derek of cheating on her during that time. However, the separation was needed since the distance helped Derek realize he wanted to be at Grey-Sloan, leading to him coming back.
With Derek and Meredith starting fresh, their happiness didn't last long as Derek died in Grey's Anatomy season 11.
Derek’s Nephew Has Joined the Grey's Anatomy Cast
The Meredith and Derek relationship came back around in Grey's Anatomy season 19 as his nephew Lucas Adams (Niko Terho) is hired at the hospital.
According to Amelia, Lucas looked up to Derek in a major way, and in turn, he was Derek's favorite nephew. The fact that Derek even had a nephew was foreshadowed very early on in the series, as he said in Grey's Anatomy season 1, episode 2, "The First Cut is the Deepest," that he had four sisters, and they all had "tons of kids."
For now, the Derek nephew twist was enough to turn heads in general, and it's one of the many Grey's Anatomy twists that keeps audiences on their toes.