The Great Pumpkin's Reign of Terror: Ranking the Michael Myers Halloween Films!
Happy Halloween, Horror Fans! Let's Rank the Michael Myers Movies!
It's Halloween! Time to celebrate all things spooky! So let's talk about Michael Myers; that terrifying slasher icon! There's so much to discuss here. We'll be ranking the entire Halloween franchise; we'll give our take and also discuss those interesting behind-the-scenes stuff that really impacted this franchise over time. Warning: there are major spoilers in the rest of the article!
While we know John Carpenter's original 1978 film reigns supreme (duh!), some newer entries really are surprisingly fun! This ranking's just our opinion (get your own take in the comments, just keep it civil!), and it is also important to note just how wildly varying people's actual opinions are about this.
The Bottom of the Barrel: The Least-Favorite Halloween Movies
13. Halloween: Resurrection (2002): A Total Disaster
After H20 somewhat revitalized the franchise, this movie is utter trash. Jamie Lee Curtis seems utterly bored, her iconic character Laurie Strode gets killed in an insanely uninspired way; all surrounded by some boring and completely forgettable cast. This failed and did nothing for anyone involved.
12. Halloween II (2009): Rob Zombie's Nightmare
Rob Zombie's take has those killer first fifteen minutes; showing Michael's hospital rampage and Laurie hides. It turns out – a dream! And it never recovers. Instead of thoughtful psychological terror, it goes full-on extreme violence and the whole tone is a departure from that classic horror setting and instead turns into a much darker and more violent experience! It felt cheap.
11. Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982): The Myers-Less Misfire
John Carpenter's attempt at an anthology horror never caught on. That creepy premise of killer Halloween masks (with the Stonehenge sacrifice…) sounds cool, but the characters were so poorly portrayed; these poorly developed moments completely impacted audience interest! A poorly received choice. And this really destroyed plans to produce a Halloween film every single year after the reception for this film came in and it ultimately led to further projects simply never materializing.
10. Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers (1989): More of the Same
The middle child of the Jamie Strode trilogy; and it is utterly unremarkable, a retread; nothing changed compared to the prior entries. A cheap plot: Michael's niece (Jamie) is targeted due to her mysterious psychic connection; some very gory kills with farm tools are present – but none of it rises to any impressive levels, it is just repetitive. The end results simply mean audiences felt bored, tired, even exhausted by repetitive storylines, a sign this particular era of the franchise needed a change in approach.
9. Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988): A Formulaic Bore
Some people adore those early sequels (4-6); others hate them. This movie brought back the slasher, Michael, but that family drama around Jamie Strode feels completely pointless. The storyline feels stale even now and most of that classic horror that many loved is absent here! Some clever kills existed, it is notable but insufficient. It didn’t change anything! So what's the point?
8. Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995): A Mystical Mess
This is utterly ridiculous; It’s the last part of the Jamie Strode trilogy. Michael now gets some insane mystical powers thanks to Thorn. A cult exists. People explode. Heads go boom. Neon lights. It’s so cheesy. There’s almost unintentional comedy which is surprisingly memorable; and for that particular purpose it succeeds but mostly as an attempt at humor only found here.
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7. Halloween Kills (2021): Good Intentions, Poor Execution
This has a superb killer. This movie delivers really strong kill scenes from Michael— some of his best— but the storyline felt quite weak and is entirely too poorly crafted to fully satisfy those audiences! Those scenes with survivors seeking revenge; some confusing events involving mental patients; and that nonsensical Laurie Strode-focused plot point makes the entire viewing experience into one utterly odd but highly disjointed movie.
There's so much in this film, It is still something to behold for some; even those odd sequences involving that unfortunate couple make it weirdly noteworthy, it ultimately fumbles something really cool into one forgettable mess.
6. Halloween II (1981): Expanding the Lore (and the Problems)
The original didn’t really need a sequel and this really proves that argument! Adding more lore made Michael boring, this is ultimately revealed, as the storyline gets altered (Michael's now Laurie's brother wanting to kill her, this makes so little sense!) However, if one tries really, really hard to enjoy some aspects of it; there’s plenty to laugh about here, with those wild kills, Jamie Lee Curtis, and Loomis vs. Michael— there’s plenty to laugh at; though those things hardly matter because the story never got developed very far.
The Good Stuff: Michael Myers Done Right
5. Halloween (2007): Rob Zombie's Gritty Remake
Rob Zombie’s remake sparked rage – because some people found issue with what Zombie did with his stylistic approach. But I liked it! While mostly similar, that prologue gives Michael more humanity and adds more psychology, it really failed; there's much more violence. A great alternative to Carpenter's original without totally discarding it, there’s little originality. Despite not feeling exactly unique in design or mechanics, this is a seriously good attempt at creating that much needed remake and bringing fresh and updated vision!
4. Halloween H20: 20 Years Later (1998): Laurie's Return to Battle
Before David Gordon Green's reboot, this film sees Jamie Lee Curtis battle Michael again! There’s a new cast featuring Josh Hartnett and Michelle Williams but that Laurie Strode vs. Michael fight remains epic. This is the kind of older Laurie seeking escape from her painful past.
3. Halloween Ends (2022): A New Spin on an Old Story
This third installment is amazingly interesting, despite some significant criticisms from earlier. That new villain, Corey Cunningham (Rohan Campbell), is bonkers. Is evil a thing you're born with, or do you gain that through some kind of really negative experience? It leaves you guessing – just that alone adds layers which many horror films miss. It’s actually really thrilling; especially if one looks past its execution difficulties and embraces those intense and genuinely unique cinematic styles which felt like Christine for this time!
The Top 2 Halloween Movies of All Time!
2. Halloween (2018): David Gordon Green's Masterpiece
A true triumph that cleverly revisits Carpenter's original ignoring those terrible intervening movies. Green's version expertly balances those classic Halloween tropes, adds strong modern characterization and is absolutely full of satisfying and tense violence! The intense plot featuring Laurie Strode in that amazing Sarah Connor mode, this adds immense satisfying moments and those highly compelling reasons to rewatch it.
1. Halloween (1978): The Original Masterpiece
The undeniable champion; John Carpenter's original Halloween! That simple yet intense storyline. That incredible build-up! The minimal but unforgettable soundtrack. That killer look! The unforgettable killer who haunts every part of this film! There’s that spooky atmosphere which elevates this far beyond all others, using tension over explicit gore – it’s pure genius.
Conclusion: Savor Those Classic Halloween Chills
From utter garbage to undeniable classics, Halloween remains a compelling slasher franchise. Even the bad movies provide value. Even a remake of some sort could be made, especially if the original script and those key story beats were reimagined with today's filmmaking styles, and there might exist the potential for remaking even a simple story like the original; given that its creative core ideas remain quite adaptable for those audiences interested in experiencing that classic era. It created iconic moments; not just the films, also Michael Myers and Laurie Strode—the pairing itself becoming legendary, deserving further explorations; and while that iconic pairing remains, there are certainly moments where that formula feels repetitive; even old. There’s a huge legacy, no question. It's a Halloween must, folks.
